8 Tips for Relationships

8. If you go to bed mad, say "I love you" before you close your eyes. Out loud. Even if your words come out sideways.

7. If he leaves his socks on the floor next to the hamper, and you want to kill him, stop. Then imagine if his socks no longer fell to that floor.

6. If he enjoys a good cigar, and you want to choke him, ask him to smoke on the porch. So he can get some fresh air. Then go do something you never get to do when he's in the house. Like watching Real Housewives who want to strangle their husbands, because they smoke cigars.

5. If you are both exhausted at the end of the day, and all you want to do is tell him how tired you are, just rest your head against his chest and dangle your arms around his body. He'll get the point, and you never know where it may lead nomatter how tired you are.

4. If your husband is not as excited about the great deal you got at Macy's, it's because to men, nothing is a deal. It's a purchase of something at the price it should have been in the first place, and the result is still less money in the bank.

3. If he asks how you learned to do that, the answer is Cosmo.

2. If you've been home with the kids all day, don't take it out on him. It wasn't him. It was his sperm.

1. If you ever wonder what he sees in you, that's why he loves you. Because you wonder.